Afraid

I've come to realize that part of the reason that I have been procrastinating on completing my work and my homework is because I am afraid. Afraid that I'll be stuck, afraid that I'd actually not know how to complete them.

So, in order not to feel lousy, I procrastinate. Well of course, the other part of the reason is I'm lazy. I'd rather watch TV or hang out with my friends than doing my work.

On a lighter note, I think scents are returning to me subtly. Well sometimes it's there and sometimes it's not. I guess this still calls for celebration.

Some viewing pleasure.

Love the Christmas hat effect and the pink of our cheeks.

Yet Again

I used to think: if only I had worked harder.

I have always believed that my lack of success in academics is solely contributed by my laziness. But recently, I feel like I've proven myself wrong.

I have been working whole-heartedly and dare I say dedicatedly last week but I'm just so goddamned slow. I am starting to think that I lack that bit of intelligence. Now this certainly hurts my self-esteem. It's not that I've been living in my own world thinking I've got brains of Einstein, it's just that I have always regarded myself as being fast-paced, not the brainy type but too bad too.

But events have played recently in a way that makes me feel that I'm 30 seconds slower. In an array of things too, may I say.

Ah well, different people are meant for different things. I hope that in time, I'd discover my destiny and with time and effort, things would improve. I'd first need to learn to see the brighter side of things.

In the meantime, sleep is sorely needed.

The price of Aging

Mum got her medical report today. Turns out she has high blood pressure, diabetes and inflamed liver. Don't worry, the situation's under control. Seems like it's not serious, just that well, she has daily pills to take now.

It got me thinking. It's just that I've always taken my health for granted. I think when you are young, you'd feel like these illnesses are way beyond you, so eat whatever you wanna eat and do whatever you like. For me, it's been taking late night baths and sleeping with wet hair.

Recently, I've come to the conclusion that I've got a weak immune system. Often, when I do get fevers, which comes along with coughs and flu, the cough would last for weeks. Just like now, I've been sick since I returned from Singapore. And that was 2 weeks ago.

So, here comes my first new year resolution: to be more health conscious ! Wait, it's 11 pm already ? And I've not bathe yet. Last time, I promise !!!