Embrace whatever

About 6 years ago my father was a manager. I wouldn't say that we were above-average, but we were financially stable. Perhaps if he hadn't left his job, he would have been able to afford my undergraduate studies in a private university without much of a burden.

Attending seminars like 'Money & You', reading books written by Robert Kiyosaki, he was inspired to jump into the bandwagon of entrepreneurship. Then began his long and treacherous journey.

It was also the time which he chose to leave the family. From a Wira we were 'downgraded' to two Kancils. From a stable income to deficit figures seeping into his savings. From that time onwards I found Astro being disconnected from time to time due to default in payments.

I found myself worrying a lot. Concerns over the extra hour I left the air-conditioner on. Concerns on whether I should get that top I desire. Concerns on whether I should ask for allowance, although my wallet is clearly empty.

Sometimes I blame him for having taken away my teen-hood. Where I should have been a worry-free teenager. Where I should only concern myself about matters like friendship, academic performance, puppy love ...

I tried talking him into getting a stable job again but he held on to his principle. I watched as he travelled from state to state to get assignments. I watched as he squeezed through the little budget he has. I watched as his skin became more tanned. I watched as his clothes became increasingly ragged. All through this he remained positive and optimistic about his little venture.

Today I am able to relate to his experience.

When I signed on to this internship, I imagined myself being assigned to assignments in which I'd learn a great deal, where I'd discover whether this line of work is my cup of tea, where I'd be able to show my potential as a prospective employee. I see myself being offered employment well before graduation.

All these need to work in time so that I would be assured a job right after graduation. Accelerating to the phase in which my parents has one child less to support, thereby enabling them to long last afford their well-deserved indulgence.

Instead I find myself staring into the computer screen everyday doing nothing. Occasionally, I am give mundane assignments. It didn't take long to crush my hopes and expectations. I started to doubt whether my future would ever turn out as expected. Or would I be living this life of submitting to second best forever.

Today I am able to relate to my father's experience.

I realize that I need to embrace whatever that comes along. It is how one goes through disappointments and failures by embracing them, learning from them and then move on with increased effort that makes one admirable. It is important to acknowledge that failure is necessary to gain skills and experiences needed for success.

Although things may not turn out as expected, it does not give reason to give up on achieving whatever we have in mind.

Today I am renewed, motivated.