Aspiration

As I'm writing this right now, the backdrop rumbles of thunder and heavy drops striking ground. These couple of days, evenings were enveloped with such unusual darkness that it seemed like my emotions has transcended to the unknown that controls all, being depicted unerringly.

My attempt to a melancholic post. Obviously, a failed attempt. Anyhow, feelings of sadness has always been my muse. I can never write a happy post which flows smoothly through my mind into words. Unless it's super happy thoughts like getting laid or something. Which should be left for another day. Joking !

At some point in my life, I had aspired to be a writer, which my Form 5 English teacher had crushed unsympathetically. You see, I've always been confident with my English. In fact, I have felt that I best all of my classmates, except for Benn de Silva I guess. But then, I started getting many many red circles and lines on essays I handed up. Apparently, it was laden with several past-tense, present-tense confusions. You can't blame me though, coming from a confused school. Well, I don't know whether I'm still 'past-tense, present-tense' confused, I sure hope not.

Then, I felt like I'm very much misunderstood. I wanted others to feel and see from my perspective. I wasn't aspiring to be a full-time writer, but I wanted to publish a book and I think I named it 'From my Perspective' or 'The Diaries of m00nie'.


Anyways, yeah, these two days I've been pretty depressed, for reasons pretty much the same. I've told myself times and times to handle things differently, to look at things differently, but when come the same situation, I tend to stick to my old ways.

So, umm, yeah, that's me for today.